Unrequited love is a theme that arises in many of the ancient texts, and honestly, is a theme that is continued to be written about today. The idea of loving someone who does not reciprocate the same feelings or is unsure about their feelings is a love story as old as time. However, unrequited love has many complexities depending on the context and can vary across relationships. In the “2nd Book”, written by the poet Theognis, the idea of unrequited love comes up multiple times, but the occurrence that stands out to me is in the story of a lover and his chase of a younger boy. This situation serves as an example of pederastic love often described in classical literature and is one of the most common examples of unrequited love. In fact, this pederastic relationship is almost encouraged by society to be an unrequited relationship. In classical society, it was common for older people to feel sexual attraction towards the idea of youth, or younger people themselves. However, it was common for younger people not to be sexually attracted to the idea of old age, or their elders. Rather, young people were encouraged to be attracted to wisdom, typically in a non-sexual way. Theognis’ story is a great example of this relationship since the lover is seen pursuing a younger, beautiful boy attempting to tell him that he is in love with him. The boy, however, does not exactly reciprocate these feelings, and the lover often brings this up in the literature, often asking why he does not respect him or return his kindness. This reminded me of a line in Guns N’ Roses’s song called November Rain, in which the singer is speaking to his lover and telling her that if she won’t love him, he’ll just keep walking in the cold November Rain. This incites a very gloomy picture and the audience thinks about the feeling of rejection or loneliness, and this is sort of the same feeling I got when reading about the older man in this story.
Although the feelings that are aroused are similar, the situations of unrequited love are very different. In the case of the “2nd Book”, it seems that there is no underlying relationship between the two men in the story, and it seems that the older man is solely attracted to the younger boy for sex. Most of the lover’s remarks about the about the younger lover are about his physical beauty and youth. On the other hand, the story told in November Rain gives the impression that there are two people who have a deep history and prior relationship. It also seems that love in this relationship is not solely sexual. The other main difference was that the love in November Rain is talked about in a hopeful way, implying that the other person actually might truly love the singer. However, the love in the “2nd Book” seemed extremely one-sided and hopeless for the lover.
“2nd Book”, Lines 1263-1266:
“Boy, you paid back a bad exchange for kindness.
No thanks from you for favors.
You’ve never given me pleasure. And though I’ve often
been kind to you, I never won your respect.”