Lucretius criticizes love and claims that it is physically and emotionally damaging. He compares lovers to thirsty people who can never be satisfied because they are unable to “remove anything from the velvety limbs” of the other person. In his eyes, lovers are endlessly willing to keep trying to satisfy their cravings and remain squirming in the “bonds on Venus” because of this. Ellie Goulding, though a modern music artist, uses very similar language when describing the body of her lover. “Not one bone in your body is good enough for me” emphasizes how she is never pleased with one part of him but rather wants all of him, which can never be possible. This insatiable hunger for another’s body is reflected throughout the song, as she repeats that there is something about him that she can’t get enough of. She is bound to wanting him, just like lovers are bound by Venus according to Lucretius.
Lovers are “so in love” with each other and their eyes can’t get enough of their bodies. Lucretius points out that their judgement is clouded by Venus because they are so in love. However, Ellie Goulding says that when she sees her lover, she can “only see the end”. She recognizes that her lover is bad for her but she still comes back to him. Both Ellie and the lovers in this book by Lucretius are addicted to their lovers, but at least Ellie can recognize the effect her lover has on her.
Lucretius
Page 130, lines 1095 – 1105 and 1113 – 1115
Just like thirsty people who in dreams desire to drink and, instead of obtaining water to quench the fire that consumes their limbs, with vain effort pursue images of water and remain thirsty, though they drink in the midst of a torrent stream, so in love, lovers are deluded by Venus with images: no matter how intently they gaze at the beloved body, they cannot sate their eyes; nor can they remove anything from the velvety limbs that they explore with roving, uncertain hands.
…
But it is all in vain, since they cannot take away anything from their lover’s body or wholly penetrate and merge into it. At times they do indeed seem to be striving and struggling to do this: so eagerly do they remain fettered in the bonds of Venus…
(Ancient Text by , translated by ) and Hello (Contemporary Song by Adele)
In Adele’s 2015 song, “Hello”, she sings about wanting to apologize to her ex-lover years later after breaking his heart. Unfortunately, he doesn’t answer the phone so she decides to leave a voicemail instead. Similarly, Aeneas finally gets a chance to see Dido in the underworld and wants nothing more than to apologize.
The closest parallel can be drawn from the chorus of the song, “Hello from the other side, I must have called a thousand times to tell you I’m sorry for everything that I’ve done, when I call you never seem to be home…” –This is similar to Aeneas’s begging for Dido’s forgiveness after learning that she committed suicide after he inevitably had to leave to Rome. He cries, “The story then that came to me was true, that you were out of life, had met your end by your own hand. Was I, was I the cause? I swear by heaven’s stars, by the high gods, by any certainty below the earth, I left your hand against my will, my queen.” We can hear the pain in Aeneas’ voice as well as Adele’s as they both are finally able to release their pent up regret and apologies.
However, things take a turn when Dido says nothing, turns away from him, and instead leaves with her beloved husband, Sychaeus. We read this in this Aeneid as “Aeneas with such pleas tried to placate the burning soul, savagely glaring back and tears came to his eyes. But she had turned…her face no more affected than if she were immobile granite or marpesian stone”. –We see the similar parallel in Adele’s song as she describes her ex-lover also being unfazed in the lyrics, “Hello from the outside. At least I can say that I tried to tell you that I’m sorry for breaking your heart, but it don’t matter, it clearly doesn’t tear you apart anymore”
The main difference we see in these two parallels is that in the beginning of Adele’s song, she admits that she hasn’t done much healing despite the amount of time that has passed. However, in the Aeneid, Aeneas ends his visit with Dido with only being “shaken by her ill fate and pitying her”. He doesn’t explicitly still love her or regret breaking up with her, he merely pities her decision to take her own life and wishes it wasn’t because of him.
The Aeneid – VI
-Page 175: Lines 615 to 620
“The story then that came to me was true, that you were out of life, had met your end by your own hand. Was I, was I the cause? I swear by heaven’s stars, by the high gods, by any certainty below the earth, I left your hand against my will, my queen.”
-Page 176: Lines 628 to 633
“Aeneas with such pleas tried to placate the burning soul, savagely glaring back and tears came to his eyes. But she had turned…her face no more affected than if she were immobile granite or marpesian stone”
Page 176 lines 638 and 639
“Aeneas still gazed after her in tears, shaken by her ill fate and pitying her”
(Ancient Text by , translated by ) and Hey There Delilah (Contemporary Song by Plain White T's)
“Hey There Delilah” is a love song written by a musician who sings about his long-distance lover, or rather, sings to her. He addresses Delilah and explains how much he misses her because he has to be miles away from her as he’s on tour for his music career. Similarly, Cicero is separated from Terentia because of the duties he also has to fulfill. Both the Plain White T’s and Cicero start off by positively comparing their lovers to a form of light. The singer starts off the song by proclaiming his love for Delilah, saying that “Times Square can’t shine as bright as you” while Cicero on page 187 cries “Alas, light of my life, for whom I yearn”. The singer then goes on to sing “Hey there Delilah I got so much left to say if every simple song I wrote to you would take your breath away I’d write it all, even more in love with me you’d fall, we’d have it all” showing that he does not write to her as often as he feels that she deserves. Similarly, on page 195 Cicero writes “I do send you a letter less often than I might…while every hour of my life is a misery…when I write to you or read a letter from you I am so overcome with weeping”. Cicero often feels pity for Terentia and apologizes for not being able to be there for her as she deserves more than that. We can see that both the singer from the Plain White T’s and Cicero try to fill the void of their absence with words to make up for it.
The greatest similarity between the two pieces is that we only get the male first-person perspective (we don’t get Delilah’s response to the song nor do we get Terentia’s letters to Cicero). This makes it difficult to assume whether or not the lovers had a happy ending.
An obvious difference between the two pieces is that the words written to Delilah are in the form of a song that the singer performs to hundreds of people whereas Cicero’s letters to Terentia are private. The two pieces, however, encompass romanticism in very similar ways. Upon further examination of “Hey There Delilah”, we can infer that the singer writes his words to mitigate for the pain that his lover feels about the long-distance, however, given Cicero’s constant weeping in the first few letters, we can infer that his writing is to vent his emotions and sadness about the distance rather than mitigate Terentia’s emotions about the situation (this is specifically evident on page 191 when Cicero writes “But, most miserable as you are, I am more miserable than you”).
Page 187: “Alas, light of my life, for whom I yearn” and But to you and our darling Tulia I cannot write without a flood of tears”.
Page 191: “I am overwhelmed with grief, my dear Terentia, and I am not more tortured by my own miseries, than by yours and my own children. But, most miserable as you are, I am more miserable than you”
In Ovid’s Ars Amatoria he writes about the ways to find and pick up women. He talks about how to deceive them and make them feel wanted. In Marina and the Diamond’s song “How to be a Heartbreaker,” she lists off rules for a girl on how to win the love of a man and ultimately leave him wanting that girl but, much like Ovid, deceiving the man and leaving him, well, heartbroken. They both write/sing about specific perspectives and are meant to be fairly light-hearted with maybe some underlying truth. Whereas Ovid’s first two books in the series appeal to what he thinks women want to see and hear, Marina’s song appeals to what she thinks the men want. They both highlight the ways in which men and women can manipulate the game of love to stack the odds in their favor.
Besides the obvious gender flipping between the two pieces, other differences exist. Ovid talks about ways in keeping a girl and creating a more lasting relationship and the lyrics in Marina’s song are for the sole purpose of being a person boys fall in love with and being in control of that power.
“First: be a confident soul, and spread your nets with assurance. Women can always be caught; that’s the first rule of the game. Sooner would birds in the spring be silent, or locusts in August, sooner would hounds run away when the fierce rabbits pursue, than would a woman, well-wooed, refuse to succumb to a lover.” (~269-273)
Unrequited love is no new concept looking at these two piece of works one can see that it was as prevalent today as it was in ancient
Greece and Rome. No matter what period no matter how hard humans try sometimes people acquire feelings and unfortunately the person of their desires does not return their affection, or their level of affection. Looking back toward Rome and Greece a great example of unrequited love is between Queen Dido and Aeneas in the Aeneid by Virgil. In this work Dido is the one with the feelings that are not exactly reciprocated. She is deeply in love with Aeneas and has saved him and his crew by giving them a place to stay and not forcing them out of her kingdom after they have crashed. For their love Dido made decisions that hurt her reputation with other kingdoms, as was referred to in the ancient text, ” because of you Libyans and nomad kings detest me, my own Tyrians are hostile.” This declaration reveals just how much that she scarified for their relationship and that she was willing to ruin her reputation not only with others but her own people and kingdom to spend time and show her affection too Aeneas. Instead of sacrificing equally Aeneas instead leaves Dido after he gets back on his feet and is ready to go back to his goal of establishing a kingdom in Italy. He leaves Dido all alone with the repercussions of her sacrifice that we made on an unrequited love. Similarly in Bruno Mar’s Grenade sings about “Gave you all I had and you tossed it in the trash.” This just outlines how similar these works are. One person giving all they have for the relationship (Dido) while the other doesn’t treasure it and instead leaves (Aeneas). Bruno also sings about all the bizarre and dangerous things he would do to show his love and protect his lover but that they would not do the same. Again very similar to the Aeneid whereas Dido gives up her reputation and is sidetracked from her goal of building her kingdom because Aeneas is in her kingdom, but instead of having the same sense of devotion Aeneas leaves her to fulfill his destiney.
Although these works are very similar, a main difference is that While Bruno would be willing to die for his lover Dido wants to die without him. For her the pain of unrequited love is worse than even death,”Why do I live on.” However, in Bruno Mars’s song he sings about what he would do to show his love which would be to die in the place of his lover. He sings about the different ways he would die for his lover trying to prove his love through how he would die for them. Dido does not exactly lament about dying for Aeneas more so without him she does not have a will or reason to live on and that death would be better than living knowing she ruined her reputation and gave up so much of herself for someone that did not have the same devotion. Both these pieces of work may be slightly different but both highlight the sacrifices one makes for love and how they are not always met equally.
If ever I did well and you were grateful
Or found some sweetness a gift from me,
Have pity now on a declining house!
Put this plan by,I beg you, If a prayer
Is not yet out of place.
Because of you Libyans and nomad kings
Detest me, my own Tyrians are hostile;
Because of you, I lost my integrity
And that admired name by which alone
I made my way once toward the stars.
To whom
Do you abandon mesa dying woman,
Guest that you are – the only name now left
From that of husband? Why do I live on?
Shall I, until my bother Pygmalion comes
To pull my walls down?
In the works of Ovid, one can see a clear attempt to almost gamify the art of courtship and by extension love. Especially in the third book, we can see these attempts geared towards women in their attempts to find a husband or spouse. Such quotes offer advice like “Put on the finishing touches privately, out of our sight./Why do I have to know the cause of your lovely complexion?/Shut the studio door, don’t give the artist away!”(pg. 160, Ovid Book 3) and “So, take pains to improve the endowments nature has given;/With sufficient neglect, Venus would look like a hag”(pg. 156). On the other hand, in the song “Crooked Smile” J Cole instead emphasizes that women should not focus on her physical appearance in order to find a spouse and that they should instead not focus on finding a husband but on their own inner beauty. J Cole sings lines that state “You wake up, put makeup on/Stare in the mirror but its clear that you can’t face what’s wrong/No need to fix what God already put his paint brush on” and also “With all the pressure to look impressive and go out in heels/I feel for you/Killing yourself to find a man that will kill for you”. J Cole also sympathizes with females as they are victim to a society that places a heavy emphasis on their physical appearance and their other flaws, stating “And when I tell you that you’re beautiful you can’t be sure/‘Cause he don’t seem to want you back/And it got you asking/So all you see is what you lacking/Not what you packing”. Ovid decides to instead utilize these societal pressures to manipulate women into behaving how he sees fit, and in doing so reinforces these stereotypes about men and women that pertain to their attraction and physical appearance respectively.
However, there are some similarities between these two works. The second book of Ovid mentions how one should “Let you mistress hear nothing but what they desire/…/Words that are sweet to the ear; make her be glad that you are there”(pg. 135, Book 2). And as such, this is possibly the purpose of this song. J Cole himself does mention how “I keep my twisted grill…/…/I got smart, I got rich, and I got b*tches still”, which first implies that his own deficient physical appearance might make him applicable to follow Ovid’s advice, and second also indicates that he maintains relations with multiple women; at least at the present moment. This does raise into question the purpose of this song, as it potentially is a manner for him to attract other women to his clade. After all, how many women who view themselves as less than desirable would appreciate a man who tells that he doesn’t care for physical appearance?
“Put on the finishing touches privately, out of our sight./Why do I have to know the cause of your lovely complexion?/Shut the studio door, don’t give the artist away!”(pg. 160, Ovid Book 3)
“So, take pains to improve the endowments nature has given;/With sufficient neglect, Venus would look like a hag”(pg. 156)
“Let you mistress hear nothing but what they desire/…/Words that are sweet to the ear; make her be glad that you are there”(pg. 135, Book 2)
Horace’s poem 1.5 is complex, but one simplified interpretation of it is that he is warning a younger male lover about what will happen after the “promises” and “enjoy[ment]” of the young man’s current love of Pyrrha is “betray[ed] [by] the breeze.” Horace warns that the boy is innocent, though he will “often … weep” over his lost lover Pyrrha, after she becomes “busy” or, in other words, stops loving him. Horace, speaking from an aged perspective, is jaded about love. He says, “[t]hey’re fools you dazzle, they haven’t tried you” implying that being in love is foolish and not worth it given the grief that comes after.
I find this to link well to the song “It’s not for me to say” by Mathis, because both talk about a lover enjoying love in the moment and both also have a major theme of time, speaking to how feelings of love can change over time.
Horace looks into the past to predict the future whereas Mathis speaks from an in-the-moment, romantic, yet wary perspective. Mathis is currently in love, trying to enjoy the moment, though he is fully aware that his love is a slave to unknown changes the future might bring.
In a way, Mathis’ song can be thought of as a retort against Horace by the young lover. Mathis says, “it’s not for me to say you’ll always care / but here for the moment I can hold you fast / and press your lips to mine.” In other words, he knows he can’t stop his lover’s feelings from possible change down the road, in fact, he says “it’s not for me to say you love me” implying that he isn’t even sure his ‘lover’ loves him as he sings, but he doesn’t care! He is able to kiss her in that moment and “as far as [he] can see [it’s] heaven.”
Together, these lines from Horace’s poem 1.5 and Mathis’s lyrics from “It’s Not for Me to Say” beg the question: is romantic love worth it if you know you might lose it? Is the old clique right- is it better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all?
“How often he’ll weep
over your promises and the shifting gods,
amazed at the seas rough with black winds,
the innocent
who now enjoys you, believes in your luster,
who thinks you’ll never be busy, always
be ready to love, not knowing the betrayals
of the breeze. They’re fools you dazzle,
they haven’t tried you” (lines 5-13).
Both Propertius and Keane talk about how people around them have changed. Propertius talks about this after losing his lover. He says, “All things change. And yes, love changes too” (Propertius 2.8, Line 7). Propertius is conveying that people and their love are constantly changing, that people may not turn out to be who we once thought they were. Keane’s song “Everybody’s Changing” also talks about this. Keane sings, “But everybody’s changing and I don’t feel the same. You’re gone from here, soon you will disappear fading into beautiful light. ‘Cause everybody’s changing and I don’t feel right”. Keane is showing that people are constantly undergoing change, and that no one is who they used to be.
One difference between Propertius’ writing and Keane is that Propertius’ writing is clearly about a lover, as opposed to Keane who seems to be singing about people in general who he cares about. Even though the people that they are talking about may be slightly different, their emotions are still similar. They both seem to care deeply about them, or at least to the people they used to be, and seem disappointed that the people around them are changing. Both of them seem to realize that because of the changes, that their relationships with the people they care about are ending. Keane and Propertius show that people in love are always undergoing constant change.
“All things change. And yes, love changes too”
Hozier and Longus both speak of the anguish in a budding relationship of wanting to be with one’s love, but not wholly knowing what that means yet. Both works utilize nature themed language and have the common theme of people wanting to simply be normal lovers.
Longus’ Daphnis desperately wants to be with Chloe, to kiss her and hold her, but he is afraid of what such kisses could do to him. Still, he teaches Chloe to play his pan-pipes, just to snatch them back and press his lips against where hers were, “as a way of kissing Chloe without doing anything unseemly” (Longus, Daphnis and Chloe, 1.24). Later, after realizing that they are in love with each other, and that kissing is something people in love do, they kiss each other frequently (2.7-9). Daphnis and Chloe want to do everything that lovers do, but they must have the traditional aspects of erotic romance spelled out for them.
Hozier’s “Like Real People Do” emphasizes this desire to just be a normal lover and, “kiss like real people do” which echoes of a similar distance of the lover to traditional romance that Daphnis has. Hozier wants to kiss his lover, but the lyrics lead one to believe that he is having to emulate other lovers. So, he thinks they should kiss like real people do, even if he isn’t entirely sure of why they would do this. Likewise, Daphnis wants to kiss Chloe, but he isn’t exactly sure what that will bring about until he learns that kissing is a remedy for love. Chloe’s mouth is also sweet (1.25) just as Hozier’s lover’s lips are- “just put your sweet lips on my lips”. Daphnis and Chloe’s story takes place in a pastoralist bubble, rife with clever cicadas (1.26), just as Hozier makes note of “the bugs and the dirt” – both works pair the natural world with awkward lovers which conjures a connection a connection between the countryside and romantic innocence.
A difference between the works is the way in which the lovers come together, Daphnis and Chloe are raised near each other and fall in love in their youth, while Hozier seems to have been sought out, or at least stumbled upon, by his lover. The Hozier song is also written from the perspective of a bog-body, but Hozier has said that he enjoys both the literal and metaphorical interpretations of the song.
Daphnis and Chloe
1.24 – “as a way of kissing Chloe without doing anything unseemly”
1.25 – “What a paradise breathes from her mouth! apples and pears are not as sweet-scented.”
1.26 – Cicada episode.
2.7-9 – Learning from Philetas and putting that knowledge to the test.
Both Sara Bareilles and Catullus decide that the best way to escape love to is to leave it all behind and travel somewhere else. Physical distance is used as a means of forgetting someone in this ancient poem and modern song. Catullus goes through a list of multiple destinations that are being considered and says that he is ready for “whatever the will of the gods will bring”. He is truly leaving his old life behind and embracing what the world throws at him, whether it be good or bad. Catullus clearly conveys that he hasn’t fully thought out what he is going to do, but needs to leave immediately. Sara Bareilles begins her song by saying that her “bags are packed” and she is moving on. Like Catullus, she is attempting to escape the past and says she hopes one day she can “breathe again”. Her past relationship has left her lost, and by traveling, Sara wants to find herself and be able to function on her own.
Catullus regards the woman he loved bitterly, and recalls how she is constantly with many men. He uses the phrase “thanks to her” when talking about his fallen love, which elicits how he blames her for hurting him. On the other hand, Sara says her ex-lover “holds my love in his hands”, as if her love for him is still alive, rather than lost like Catullus’ love is. Though Catullus and Sara may both be leaving, they are leaving for different reasons and regard their lovers differently. Catullus wants to be rid of a woman who did not acknowledge his love, while Sara feels she needs to leave to find herself again even though she still loves this man.
Catullus
Page 201-202, Poem 11, lines 1-14, 21-24
Furius and Aurelius, comrades of Catullus,
whether he shall go as far as distant India,
where the shore is beaten by the roaring
Eastern wave,
or the Hyrcani or the dainty Arabs,
or the Sagae or the arrow-bearing Parthians
or the seas that the seven-mouthed Nile
discolors,
or if shall climb the lofty Alps
to see the marks of Caesar’s greatness,
and the Gallic Rhine and the chilling sea
of far-off Britain
–ready to risk all these things with him,
whatever the will of the gods shall bring
…
let her not look, as before, to my love,
for thanks to her it has fallen like a flower
at the meadow’s edge, after it’s been nicked
by a passing plow.
(Ancient Text by Cicero, translated by ) and Here I Go Again (Contemporary Song by Whitesnake)
While reading Cicero’s letters to Terentia, I was picturing a movie or play scene in which two people are writing back and forth to each other, and the characters are speaking what they are writing for the audience to hear, but they can’t hear each other’s voices. However, there is an absence of Terentia’s voice because her letters are not available. Nevertheless, this picture made me think about two lovers who are currently separated, but really want to be together again. However, they realize that they can’t really be together and probably won’t see each other for a very long amount of time. This does not stop them from feeling love from a distance, however, through these letters. This kind of situation reminded me of some lyrics of the song, “Here I Go Again” by Whitesnake, particularly the lyrics that go, “An’ I’m gonna hold on for the rest of my days”. The attitude in these lyrics is one that portrays a sense of knowing that something bad is happening or will happen, but the singer will “hold on” no matter what. Now, “hold on” is a very vague phrase, but I was thinking about this in terms of love between two people. In these letters, Cicero consistently ends the letter asking Terentia to take care of her own health, implying that he is not there to care for her, but more interestingly, he mentions “The present state of affairs…” and “how they affect [him]”. This paints the picture that there is something barring him from being able to see Terentia and he reluctantly acknowledges this, but does not abandon his love for her. He “holds on for the rest of his days”. The difference I see between these two cases is that Cicero may have the opportunity to see Terentia again. In the song, the feeling is that the loneliness will indeed last forever, but the singer will “hold on” anyway. In other words, I am interpreting “the rest of my days” to mean a finite amount of time in the case of Cicero and Terentia, but an infinite amount of time in the case of the song.
Cicero’s Letters to His Friends by Cicero, Letters to Terentia, Letter 17
“The present state of affairs you can see for yourself; how they affect me, you can learn from Lepta and Trebatius. Be sure to take care of your own health and Tullia’s health. Good-bye.”
Both the song by the Beatles and the ancient text from Sappho are talking about longing for something. Both of the speakers show sorrow. In the ancient text by Sappho, the sorrow is shown by the phrase “free me from jagged sorrow.” They believe that the person they love is the cure for their sadness and if they get this person back then all their troubles will be solved. For the song, a similar sadness is expressed by the phrase, “now I need a place to hide away.” They do not want to confront their problems and face the fact that yesterday has passed and the one they love is no longer in their life. So, in each case, the speaker has essentially lost something they love and long for that back.
Differences can also be seen in the song and the ancient excerpt. Even though it seems like the two speakers are longing for the same thing they are expressed in two different ways, one being the time when they were with the other person and one the other person directly. In the song, “yesterday” is the thing being longed for. This was a time when the speaker was with the one they loved. Now, all the speaker wants to do to is “hide away.” The longing nature of love is also present in the ancient text by Sappho in the phrase “make what my heart is longing for, happen.” The thing that is being referred to here is the other person in the relationship. This can be seen by the next sentence, “You yourself fight alongside me.”
1 (L-P) lines 25-28;
Come to me now once more, and free me from jagged sorrow, and make what my heart is longing for happen. You yourself fight alongside me.
Sappho expressed how it feels to see someone you love with another person and how that consumes his every thought. His entire body is feeling the effects of seeing the person he loves in the arms of someone else such as going mute and a flame invading their flesh. 5 After Midnight expressed how living without the person they love is driving them insane. They want so badly to have the one they love back. Near the middle of the song, similar to the pain that Sappho expressed, losing the one they love caused misery and pain and caused them to break down and cry. Both the song and the poem put emphasis on the person they love and how losing that person have affected him physically and emotionally.
Both the text and modern song display the feelings that come about from losing the one you love. Each does so by expressing how terrible they feel internally and externally, but the focus in the modern song is more about the person they lost and the ancient text is about the person they lost their beloved to. Unlike the song chosen, Sappho puts a lot of emphasis on the other person who is now with his beloved. This man was said to be “equal with the gods.” The song focuses on the other person by saying that they would bring the person flowers in the rain and never let them go.
Sappho 31(L-P) lines 1-16
“He seems equal of the gods, that man, who sits with you face to face and, near you, listens closely to your lilting voice, your tempting laugh, which sets my heart a-flutter in my breast. For when I see you even a moment, I can’t speak any longer, but my tongue goes mute…., a sudden, slender flame invades my flesh, my eyes go dark, my ears are roaring, cold sweat covers me, a trembling seizes all my body, paler than grass am I, and little short of dead I seem to myself”
Throughout Catullus’s 76 poem, we see him struggling to get over a relationship. He begins to describe it as some kind of a sickness that he can not overcome. He writes, “I’m no longer asking that she love me back, or — impossible — that she be chaste; I want to get well, put away this foul sickness. Oh gods, give me this for what I’ve done right.” (Lines 23-26). We see that Catullus so badly wants to overcome his feelings, but is unable to do so. Similarly, Panic! At the Disco’s song “Nicotine” displays a very similar message. The song goes, “You’re worse than nicotine. Just one more hit and then we’re through, ‘Cause you could never love me back. Cut every tie I have to you, ‘Cause your love’s a f*cking drag, But I need it so bad”. Here, they describe love as being similar to a nicotine addiction, something that they can’t get rid of by themselves.
Even though Catullus is talking about a sickness and Panic! At the Disco is talking about addiction, I think that their feelings are very similar. They both appear to be wanting to get rid of their feelings for another person, but are trapped by their unwanted love. Even though it seems clear to both of them that they should not be getting back with their lover, they simply can’t resist.
“I’m no longer asking that she love me back,
or — impossible — that she be chaste;
I want to get well, put away this foul sickness.
Oh gods, give me this for what I’ve done right.”
(Catullus 76, Lines 23-26)
Ovid and Pat Benatar both recount the difficult, emotionally challenging nature of love, with both metaphorically comparing love to a military battlefield or war. Both clearly acknowledge that love is not for the faint or heart, with Ovid stating it is “no assignment for cowards” and Benatar proclaiming “we are strong”, showing that emotional fortitude and endurance is required to live through the battle of love. This emotional fortitude is needed because of “grief and excessive fatigue” according to Ovid and “heartache” according to Benatar. Therefore, the battle, no matter how hard fought, will often result in a broken heart. Despite knowing the dangers and difficulties of the battle for love ahead, the writer and songstress both compare love to being held in bondage, trapped, and chained, showing that they cannot leave the metaphorical war or battle even if they want to. They are emotionally and cognitively imprisoned to their lover.
Despite these many similarities, both passages take on different subjects overall. Benatar’s song focuses on the carelessness and arrogance of young love, with the narrator proclaiming “we are young” and “no one can tell us we’re wrong”. In contrast, Ovid’s text does not mention young love but instead advises the young man to take dangerous actions to impress his lover. Therefore, both passages start very similarly in their descriptions of love as a war or battlefield often resulting in hardship, grief, and heartache, but they diverge in topic when examined in the works’ larger contexts (such as the text before and after the selected passage or the song lyrics in their entirety).
Ars Amatoria Book II, pp. 137
Love is a kind of war, and no assignment for cowards. Where those banners fly, heroes are always on guard. Soft, those barracks? They know long marches, terrible weather, Night and winter and storm, grief and excessive fatigue…Put off your pride, young man; enter the bondage of love.